Face Down.

So, hey. I am writing this whilst stuck on a bus, filled with mundanes. There are two lovebirds, sitting right in front of me, kissing and making out before me and there is a lady staring out the window as well. The man right beside me was pretty occupied with his phone and I am beginning to wonder that he, is indeed waiting for a call or rather a text. I see his shoulders hunched and I see them tensed as I can see teardrops of sweat rolling down his messed up hair all the way to the side of his cheekbone.
 Looking at this, I forced a little laughter out of myself.

Funny isn't it that it is almost dinner time yet I am still not home? Isn't it hilarious that it is going to be almost night time yet I am still out with a cup of McFlurry Oreo Ice-Cream in my hands and it was such an exhausting day. It really was. To reward myself with a cup of ice-cream was no of a big deal of what I've done. To my surprise, I haven't even had a meal today and it freaks me out as to how my immune system is really holding me up to support me especially 
during this stress and tough times.

Honestly, I do wonder. Are there true and honest people out there? I mean, don't get me wrong but I doubt if there's just ever anyone who was always on set to actually hear me whine and complain? It tore me apart today and I honestly think that it is taking its toll on me. Like it is climbing all its way up and 
clouding in this one side of me.

You see, funny when I was there when you self-destruct. Like I stood by you against all odds and this is what I get? Like seriously? I remember standing by your side, never leaving, when you had something going on in your life. I was there when we talk of things. Yet today, you could have actually told me that  should probably quit complaining so much. I mean, so what if I whine too much? I mean, I am a girl. Like seriously. I am typical. So what? I freaked out. I was scared, yet to actually get things prepared and got myself mentally and physically ready,
 freaking me out as fook.

Can't you just for once actually listened to me? I guess, I should probably be more positive and probably take it as a constructive criticism. However, how am I to do it when people are to judge me as fake? Being myself seems to be a really hard thing 
to do when I am around you.

This, it never did bother me much cause' I waved it off after a little while. To actually having to see you during break today, made my day. I suppose when we both offered food, we looked at each other, smiled a little smile and we continue to have it in out palms, throw it into our mouths, down our throats, start chewing and whilst doing all that, you had a smile on your face whenever our eyes met each other. To finally have you singing to me made me smile and the idea is there is always a song that comes to your mine wherever 
you see me. Therefore, I thank you.

Here is a cheer and a toast to all these little things ;

Toxic ; Britney Spears. 

Some nights ; I think ; Man I hate you, fook you ; but other nights I think ; I love you and miss you so much. 

Please come back It is terrible.