Dear Lost Soul,

 





















I gave you the key to my heart, just a minute. When nobody ever did dare to come near this scarred soul of mine. Honestly, if I could say a thousand things, I believe 

I have already done that. But too many words becomes useless, so I would just leave it at, I wish I could hate you. 

There are just too many instances where I know deep down that you say things on purpose to my face just to push me off. To see whether would I be hurt by it. But, as time goes by, I have come to a realization that maybe this stubbornness of mine have liked you. All of your sides. 

All of those pain, sadness inflicted upon you, I wished
 I could absorb them away. Every single time I looked at you, I died a little inside, knowing I couldn't help but to watch you die a little more each day. What have you done to deserve all of this pain daily? You've been nothing ; 
but such a precious little child.

I wish I could tell you that every time I look at those quiet eyes of yours, they tell me so much. Of things you work 
so hard to hide. Of feelings you've put yourself through. 

You told me words you never meant to say to anyone. 
It was when we were walking up the hill, and I could have promised that, it was the longest walk, I've ever put ourselves through. It was all lies I convinced myself. 
I could see it in your eyes as you laugh to wave them off. You daringly looked me in the eye and told me that you are fine. But how could you be fine at all, if there is never a single day where your mind don't wander off to think about her. I blinked and I swallow my words away. I could feel my throat burning as I forced words out of my mouth. 

You are deserving. You are capable of being loved yet 
you turn people away. You shut people off the instant you know that people care for you. You are so afraid of loving and being loved that you feel so freaking undeserving. 

As we bid goodbyes, I realized that this addiction of you would eventually drive me crazy. It is sad as I fear my words would never be good enough for you, but I would stop at I was on my knees when nobody else was praying, so just hold on. I would do anything just to keep you warm. I would just stay no matter how hard you would push me away. I wished everything I do would be good enough for you to realize because eventually, 
I would be just another girl, you'll forget. 

"Things would be better, soon", 
"Fate has got different plans for us".

You asked why do I worry so much if anything happened to you. It wasn't as if you mattered. Why would I fear if you were going to die. Shamelessly, I just shook my head. I looked so hard at you and questioned myself back why did I even bother. I kept silent as my mind screamed so loudly, I wished you could hear them."I NEED YOU", 
I thought, but I didn't say it.  

Hold on, pain ends. This would eventually end. 
39 more to go :) 

Countdown : 39. 

Topic : Dear Lost Soul,  

Labels : Him, The One, Lost Soul.